I lost my Gusto and am Running on Gust-Low
by roxanne on 01/07/10 at 8:33 am
Action Point #2: I will regain my Gusto.
I don’t know if it was the economy, or the drought, or what, but in the last couple of years I have lost my gusto. I have lost what makes me Roxanne. And it has been so gradual that I didn’t even realize it.
But what I realized is my gusto comes from so many enjoyable things I do in life that ultimately shape who I am.
I started realizing that two of my personal indulgences were gone: Magazine and Books.
Magazines! I don’t read magazines anymore. I used to have subscriptions to at least four magazine. I let all but Self magazine lapse. But why? Ever since I could read I loved magazine: Highlights was my first subscription. Then came Teen, Seventeen, and YM! The list goes on and on.
I would read a good one from cover to cover. I rip the goodness out of it and keep it. I’d scoff at the ridiculous stuff. I am empowered by inspirational stories. I love magazines!  Knowledge about a lot of things – fashion, current events, opinions. Why did I let that go? It is part of my DNA!
Books! I used to read at least three books a month no problem. I loved to read. I have even written a book. But lately,
I haven’t picked up a book at all. For some reason I picked up my little sister’s latest chick lit book and took it with me to Madrid for the holidays. The Pre-Nup was the name of it…by some author that was obscure to me. I thoroughly enjoyed the book. You know when you get to the end of a book and then mourn the loss of the story–no more pages to pour over. That is how I felt. And The Pre-Nup turned on the light in me that had been dim for so long…my love for books.
And that is when I realized that overall my charm, my jena se qua, my gusto was Gust-Low!
So far this is my POA to get my GUSTO back:
1) I will read at least one book a month. 
Already I have bought Eat.Pray.Love, The Nanny Returns, and Twitterture. I am itching to read Mika Brzezinski’s, All Things At Once, I dig her!
2) I will read magazine to my heart’s content. This month I have read O, Self, Essence, and Glamour. FYI Glamour knocked it out of the park this month. I renewed my subscription to Self and Glamour, and am going to add a few more. Stay tuned…
3) I will open a Reward Bank. This week I started rewarding myself $1 when I do something hard but 
ultimately good. Notice I said something good. Not something A-mazing. Resolutions, Rebooting, POA’s whatever you like to call them are all about baby steps. So rather than celebrate the ultimate accomplishment at the end. Why not celebrate the little things. Here is how. Ever time I make a decision that is hard but ultimately good for me, I give myself a dollar. At the end of the year, I am using all the money I banked on something fun.
Example: I really didn’t want to work out on Tuesday. It wasn’t convenient. I wasn’t in the mood. But I did it. And I earned a dollar.
Bribe? Maybe. But so far it is working. I may buy myself a fabulous purse or something. Not sure yet.
The Reward Bank officially opened on 1/4 and already I have $5. Oh yeah!
4) I will Journal baby. You hear this all the time – Keep track of your progress accomplishments etc. I have a slew of old journals, but again I have stopped lately. But it was meant to start back. So I have a journal and a notebook. The journal has my POA’s, desires, dreams, woes, inspirational statements, quotes, etc. (Some I even pulled out of magazines.) And the notebook tracks my progress on all of my POAs. And it is colorful and creative and oozes Roxanne with the gusto…
5) I will not ignore obvious signs. I am not a huge tea leaf reader, but there are certain things that are not coincidence. My mom got me a journal for Christmas. She didn’t know I needed a journal. I didn’t even know it at the time. But when I got home with my gift, rather than putting it aside, I opened it and began writing, and all of this and more started spewing out. Things happen for a reason. And sometimes the reason is to steer you in the right direction. My challenge is to be aware of that.
Bottom line: Now is a good time to take stock. What has changed about you? What little things have you let go without even realizing that they have a big impact on who your are? Maybe its time for you to pick back up the magazine, the book, the whatever.
Next time: POA #3 I will regain my personal style…
